💕Calling in the One: Day 29
Today's lesson was about commitment. Commitment is tough for me because when I decide to commit, I give so much of myself that I feel like I don't have anything left for myself. I also tend to overestimate what I'm actually capable of, so during times of feeling rested and filled up, I tend to over-give, over-book myself, over-commit. Then when I'm inevitably depleted, I isolate and over-protect my energy reserves. I'm learning that as an emotionally sensitive person, I need to give myself the time to go through an entire emotional cycle (a high and a low) before truly committing to something so that I have the time and space to feel it out. Luckily, I have friends that understand and support me in this process. Given a snap decision, I'll most likely say yes because I really want to give. Less and less willing to commit, I attract unavailable men.
Katherine Woodward Thomas also made a great point in this chapter about not getting so caught up in your emotions that any infringement on your ability to explore and express them fully becomes a huge burden. I definitely feel like a lot of the work I've done to heal has created an even deeper sensitivity within myself to pain, pleasure, and especially my emotions. Even studying acting had me so present to my emotions that I really have placed immense importance on processing and expressing them. Perhaps too much. I have found that I'm needing more alone time to really reflect and sort through things. I just realized that I need to burn up some of this water by doing something fiery. It's what I would recommend to a client with these symptoms, so I should probably follow my own advice. Less water and a little more fire will give me a lot more follow through!
What were your conclusions from this chapter? Comment below!
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Warmest Wishes, Rachael