- Rachael M. Shaffer, RMT
💙 Navigating the Waters of Relationship

🌊Part of having a discerning heart as an emotional person in relationship is the understanding that some will come into your life to take from your pool of emotional energy, while others show up to give. When that pool is getting on the shallow end, we need to do something for ourselves to fill it up or spend time with people who either add value through emotional support and that sense of connection or those who already know how to take tasks that use up our emotional energy out of our hands or who do so instinctively (because asking and teaching someone how to care for you take up emotional energy as well). On the other hand, when our pool is overflowing, we may seek out those who wish to receive from us because it feels wonderful to contribute and share ourselves with the world. The more intimate the connection, the more intensely you will feel the give and take at the emotional level.
🚣We navigate this emotional exchange rather intuitively, based on how we are feeling, as our pool can fill up in a moment of gratitude, love, and the like. Our pool can also empty in an instant from the perception of loss, shame, etc. If we have refined caring for our emotional well-being and filling ourselves up, we may accept that, at times, we require solitude, other times togetherness, and there's no charge around managing that. No shame. No judgment. It's as important as caring for a home or vehicle that we want to function optimally. However, some of us have a wounding and belief that we are not enough just as we are, so we over-give, overshare, overbook ourselves until our emotional pool is empty with nothing left for ourselves. This is why relationship may be such a challenging and mysterious phenomenon to the empath, hsp, intuitive or emotional individual. We are often given the impression that there is something wrong with us and aren't taught how to care for our emotional health -- so it's pertinent to understand what fills you up and provide that for yourself, as our personal needs are separate from our relationship needs. Growing in discernment, emotional intelligence, and mindfulness helps us flow through the emotional waters of relationship much more fluidly.
Warmest Wishes, Rachael